So what has Recruitment and Selection got to do with finding a partner? Whether romantic or business, the same principles can be applied to the search process. This of course means that rather than leaving our chances of finding partners to chance, we are adopting a systematic approach to the entire process. We are borrowing tried and tested techniques from the field of Human Resources Management, more specifically Recruitment & Selection.
Develop a Good Partner Profile
Let’s begin with the foundation, however this time we would be replacing the job profile with the partner profile. What are the unique characteristics of your ideal partner? Can you describe them? What values should they posess? What background should they have? What life or work experience should they have? What qualifications should they possess? For Romantic partners you can add physical attributes however for business, values, background and experience are more important. Personality is also a very important aspect in finding the right partner. Different personalities have different dynamics, some may be full of conflict while others may manage conflict much better. Again, the quality of the profile created can make or break the validity of the process. The profile forms the basis of the search thus, any missing vital piece will mean the wrong partners may be sought. Of course sometimes people develop a profile that is actually a poor fit for them, thus this is a process that should be given a lot of serious thought to mitigate the risks of a poor match.
Develop a Good Recruitment Strategy
Once a profile is ready, the search can begin, one must decide the best way to find the ideal partner. A recruitment strategy should be developed at this point. Just as in recruitment, good questions to ask include, Where am I likely to find this profile of person? Should I advertise? If so, where? Should I get help from my network of friends, family and colleagues or should I try an agency that specialises in finding such people? The search may be quick or it may take some time, either way the profile should be revisited as the process progresses.
Assess and Evaluate Shortlist
Once some potential matches are gotten i.e a shortlist, they should be assessed and evaluated using pre-determined criteria. For business it could be interviews or a business lunch for romantic based partnerships. it could be several dates including dates that include having other people like friends or family present. Consider the usefulness of panel interviews, rather than just one interviewer you have several interviewers. The same principles apply to dates, the potential partner should be dated by other parties to get a more rounded view of them. Sometimes, it takes a few assessments of some candidates to realise the profile needs tweaking. Either way, it is a process that needs time and thought. Sometimes it is as simple as one search process sometimes the search has to be repeated.
Willingness of both Parties
Similar to recruitment, finding a partner is not just a one sided exercise. Recruitment is indeed a matchmaking process. Both parties must be willing. In as much as someone is searching, they must also as in recruitment ask themselves if the kind of people they want will be attracted to them? It is not enough to develop an ideal profile, you should also ask yourself if your ideal profile will consider you their ideal profile or even be attracted to you. Borrowing from recruitment you must be able to identify your value proposition. What unique benefits will they derive from partnering with you?
Now what I have described is a very systematic approach and definitely very different from how people seek partners. However, this is the approach used by matchmaking agencies and people who want to try a more systematic approach void of emotional decisions.
I hope you were able to learn a ghing or two on the recruitment and selection process while drawing principles that can be very useful to other aspects of life.
So what do think? Will you try it?
Written by Adora Ikwuemesi